This Shit (BlogTransplant ) Won't End...

There's no logical place to start This...

Friday night.

All was going well up until about 2 am. We were all at Twink's. Mac was just about to go to bed but Hadn't. Hubby rang a taxi. Then started accusing Me of not wanting to go home yet. Buffoon wants to party on all the time. That's what He thinks anyway.

"I fucking Hate you", He tells Me.

"Why do you keep doing this all the time?"

Me: "Do what exactly? Want to come home with you when You're telling Me in front of everybody that you hate me?"

No fucking Thanks.

He left about half past; yelling a torrent of abuse as he goes. Twink tells Me I don't have to go home to That if I don't want to. I know that I have to regardless...

I search; but I can't find the keys to the car and besides- I'm way too drunk and wasted to drive. So I call a cab too; even though I know Hubby will go rank at Me for spending more money on a cab when he has just used one himself; but anything's better than what Will happen if I don't get my Sorry Arse home quick-smart. I leave the car at Twinks; not even knowing if I've left the keys there or at the Pub.

I get home at three. I go to bed. It's cold. We're angry with each other but we still snuggle for warmth. At about five he decides to try to fuck me. I don't let him. Why would I fuck someone who Hates me? So Openly?

He gets out of bed snarling shit. Little Son is at the front door with my Father because I'd messaged my mother that I didn't have my car at home. That got Hubby pissed off too- but not quite as much when he realised he's left his motorcycle helmet in the back seat of the car and that if he wants to ride it he'll have to get himself to Twink's.

He's going off at Me like I've never heard him before. He's told me he hates me plenty of times when he's been Drunk- but Never sober. Until now.

"What the fuck for? What did I do? I was home half an hour after You. I didn't do anything but do what you said. Why the fuck are you punishing me for it?"

Truth is; I probably Would have stayed out longer if he hadn't cracked the shits at me and left in such a way. I thought we were all having fun. I didn't think it made me a fucked up person.

Apparently it Does.

He left yelling; telling Me I was a fucked up Bitch because no he had to walk over to Twink's to get the car. I yelled at Him to catch a cab but he ignored that and strode off; taking all the money in the house and the bankbook and both of my keycards.

I messaged him...

"I fucking did what you told me to so stop punishing me for it. When you take away all of my options what choice do I have but to stay; you tell me you hate me and then make me be here. I don't get you."

He ignored it.

I rang. He hang up. Three or four times.

"Will you stop?"

He ignored Me.

"Seeing as you hate me I bet you're glad you didn't get to fuck me this morning; you still tried but- Hypocritical Cunt. This is a roller-fucking-coaster. It's Your stupid game. I'm just playing along."

He rang.

Told Me he planned to stay out and get trashed; seeing as that's what I like to do So Much. I told him fine; but that I needed the car and my keycards back.

Why; he wanted to know.

To Get Some Fucking Money You Imbecile...

I rang Twink. He convinced Hubby to let him drive the car over for me. I dropped Twink back at the Pub where Hubby was already onto his second beer for the morning. He stayed out all day; as promised.

I took Little Son to the movies and watched Shrek The Third. I fell asleep towards the end...

We had toasted sandwiches for dinner. Eldest Son was staying over at his friend's house for the night. Little Son and I went to sleep.

Hubby snuck in through the kitchen window about two thirty; drunk and off his face- and slept on the lounge...

His eyes are open slightly so I ask Him What time he got home.

"What's it to You?"

So he must want to continue...it Begins again. The Shit Hits The Fan.

So I take little Son out for the day. We have a milkshake at the park and then had an icecream down at The Bogey Hole and then took a drive around the beach. I had a great time and to be honest I really didn't feel like going home.

So I dropped little Son back and then went to the Pub for an hour. Fido turned up for a beer but everyone else was too hungover from the night before. I got a few snippets of information about which drugs Hubby had consumed and then I got a phonecall. It was from an old high school friend who I've recently got back into contact with...

"Can I come up and see your new house? Tonight? Because I don't feel like going home right now?"

Thanks Friend. See you soon.

I took home KFC for Hubby and the kids. And then left again. I got a six pack of beer on the way over and we settled in over a few drinks and Big Brother. It was good to catch up; and to bitch. Though we've lost contact over the last three or four years she well knows Me and my Hubby's turbulent history. I regard her as one of my Past-Best-Friends- if that makes sense. Someone who I once used to consider as my Best friend. It's not even as though she or I moved away and lost contact; more that she is a lot of hard work for a friend to deal with sometimes...

But we had a good time. She vented and I vented. I went home after Daniela was evicted; full of delicious homemade pumpkin soup and toasted cornbread; washed down with beer and some last-minute pancakes with whipped cream and strawberry jam. She even gave me a container of soup to take home. I'm going over more often after this; next time she tells me she'll make me a Laska...

So I got home at ten thirty. Took little Son with Me straight to bed.

Hubby slept on the lounge.

I got up; got ready for work. I gave little Son his breakfast and left; asking Hubby as I left if he wanted Me to bring anything back for Him.

He grunted a No. I asked how much longer was he intending on keeping this up. He said nothing. I slammed the door.

He was asleep on the lounge when I got back from work and doing some shopping; little Son playing by himself out in the yard with the dog. I washed up the dishes and put on a load of laundry before showering and dressing myself and little Son.

"I'm going to my Mother's for a few hours. My Sister and niece are visiting from Canberra for a few days. I'll be home in a while. I got macaroni and chips to go with those lamb chops you defrosted for yourself."

Grunt.

He'd made himself dinner already when I got back at six thirty. I cooked little Son up a couple of sausages and made him a little salad and then went into eldest Son's bedroom where I watched TV for the rest of the night; as away from Hubby as I could be. Because If he hates Me like he says then he would be glad to be away from me...right?

About nine thirty I went to bed to lay down with little Son while he fell asleep. Ten minutes late Hubby turned off the television.

I got up as soon as little Son was asleep and went into the loungeroom.

"Are you happy staying there are you?"

"Yep" He grunted. And then slept on the lounge.

Ten past six this morning he woke me up to take him to work. It was fucking freezing but that was nothing compared to the frostiness of the car trip.

"Usual time?" I asked to nobody- as he got out of the car; barely uttering a Thanks as he was just about to shut the door. I drove home and wrote this post.

Now I'm off to work.

This shit won't End.