I Want Him To Feel Like I Do...

Got a bit upset tonight- same shit different day. I know my Hubby judges me for the things I either do- or don't- do; depending on the situation.

Like (and here I go again, whinging and bitching about everything again) why he doesn't help me with shit; why does he get angry when I don't do shit for him when it's impossible to ask the same of him. When he was on the couch earlier I even thought of saying to him that I knew how lonely it was to wank by myself and how nice it would be to have some help- except he would have taken that as an invitation instead of what it was; a non-compliment and a rejection back- just one of the thousands that I've gotten.

I know I'm a bitter bitch but I just can't help being resentful about stuff. I want him to appreciate me and when he doesn't I do what he does right back at him. Is it a punishment or pure vindictiveness I'm not sure? I want him to feel like I do...rejected I supposed. Though I hate saying it. Especially when he can be so nice; but then again so can I. And it's only when he does something-Anything-to upset me that I change tactics and go from being loving 'lil me to bitchy old Buffoon.

I don't know how to stop this behaviour. It's almost instinctive in me to act this way. I'm only this way with my Hubby. Most people only ever get the 'nice me'; that's all they ever see.

Is it only when you are in a relationship that you feel you can get away with freely dumping on another person? What happened to accountability for stuff?

I konw my Hubby would never act the way he does with me with someone else; and I wouldn't either. Something's going on. Something's not right.